Sun. March 11

 What becomes a legend most? Are Joan Collins and Linda Evans legends? In a way, yes. They certainly wormed their way into America’s heart during the ‘80s reign of “Dynasty,” as the cat-fighting ex-wife and wife of John Forsythe’s character, Blake Carrington. Now they’re back on stage in “Legends!,” playing two actresses of a certain age who are trying to keep their pride, but struggling and in tough shape – financially, medically, professionally. Collins, who we meet first in the play, is Sylvia Glenn, who has mostly played tramps and hookers in her cinematic career. Her rival, Evans, plays Leatrice Monsee, who has mostly played the good girl in film, save one memorable role as a psycho killer. A producer, Martin Klemmer (played by Joe Farrell) is trying to seduce them into appearing together in his off-Broadway production, “Star Wars – The Play,” by promising Paul Newman will be in it as well. He connives to get the two together at the ritzy New York apartment of Glenn’s friend. Before the three meet, Glenn and Monsee get to let it out. “I thought it was Morticia from ‘The Addams Family’,” says Monsee, upon Glenn’s entrance. “Didn’t you used to be Smokey the Bear?” Glenn retorts, referencing Monsee’s fur-trimmed cape. Later, as they’re beginning to bond – yes, you knew this was coming, we’re not spoiling anything – Glenn asks, “Do you miss it? Our time at the top of the mountain?” Monsee says that even if they’re not at that mountaintop, she wouldn’t resort to doing some trashy awful TV series ... “Like ‘Dallas’ or ‘Dynasty’,” finishes Glenn.
    “Legends!,” finishes up a brief run Sunday March 11 at the Citi Shubert Theatre, was originally produced in 1986. It’s set in 1985. Carol Channing and Mary Martin had the original roles. With Collins and Evans aboard – both of whom have penned self-help books - "Legends!” now plays off our knowledge of the stars and how we look back at that era. Was it the dawn of guilty pleasure TV? Doesn’t it almost seem innocent compared to today’s fare, like “Dirt” and “Desperate Housewives?” And isn’t a kick to watch the actors – so in on the joke – take on these roles (and role reversals)? When Monsee accuses Glenn of being “still the same, sordid, scheming, lying tramp” she always was, Glenn asks, “What do you mean, scheming?”
      The two-hour play is not high art, but it is jolly, semi-naughty fun. Both Collins and Evans look terrific – which is to say they seemed no older than we are and we guarantee you they are - and seem to be having fun. Tonye Patano is great as Aretha, the large, wisecracking black maid, and she takes some sexy-funny turns with the pumped-up black Chippendale Boom-Boom Johnson, played by Will Holman, during his strip tease to “R-E-S-P-C-T.” The final performance is at 2 p.m. matinee Sunday. Tickets: $69.50-$39.50.

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